I feel I cant face anyone at the moment, I cant pretend everything is okay for any longer. Into the seclusion of my lonely bed I go.
The 3 hours and 20 minutes I got to be with you were indescribable - A level of happiness I can honestly say haven't felt in a long time - since I was last with you.
I felt weak at the knees with desire when I saw you marched toward me in a group 30-ish chanting something I didn't quite understand.
I don't think I can even try to explain in any sort of words how it felt to hug you so tight that first time. Utterly amazing. I truly wanted to burst into tears and tell you how I hate not having you around and much I miss you, just how much I suffer without you there for me. I feel I'm really hopeless at thing long distance Army girlfriend thing. I know I am. Anyone who copes fine in a situation like this must be extremely independent and strong. Or they just don't truly care.
Everything about you was so tranquilizing. Your voice, your smell, your touch, your engulfing bear hug...
3 and a half hours flew by, felt like an hour with you. If that.
The goodbye was the hardest part - as suspected I suppose.
I walked back with you alone to your barracks, I remember you said you aren't allowed to display any public affection in the Army base, no holding hands, no kissing etc.
I like that you chose to disobey the rules for probably the first time at that moment. You hugged me tight and kissed me passionately regardless of who was around. Once again I wanted to burst into tears and never let you go. I continually told you I love you and that I missed you already. I had to let you go once again, knowing full well I wasn't going to see you until March Out Day.
I endured a long drive home with your parents trying to hold back my tears and keep it together.
No comments:
Post a Comment